Note 4:

What if I told you that I have fallen for you,
Would you run away or come close to kiss me?
What if I told you that my parched eyes ache for your gaze,
Would you blink away or get a blush on your face?
Won't you want to hold my hand once.. think of me as the part missing from you?
Don't you see how our fingers meet?
Like they had been wanting to fill the lines of our palms with the love of our souls.

Note 3:

I was always told that I am a strong woman. So much so that it got embedded in my soul. I have always been proud of this fact. The fact that I have been raised in a way which enables me to stand for myself. I have faced the worst storms all by myself. And then I met you. I wanted you. I valued you. Never realizing that one day you will become another storm in my life. The storm that is trying to destroy me into pieces. I know I will pick myself up again but am unsure if, this time, the pieces will fit in the same place.

Good part of 'Sh*t Happening'

Shit Happens! Ha.. It happens more than often. And more often more than shit.

A friend was visiting and we went out for a quick bite where she happened to mention her new love interest. She had just undergone a breakup two months back and I won't deny that it surprised me that she moved on so quickly. Hence I made sure that it wasn't a rebound. And it didn't look like one. I saw her happy, feeling cute about it which was definitely missing in her in her past relationship.

From what she told me the guy seemed sorted and mature. They both had been friends for quite sometime and hence were already in a comfort zone. I don't want to discuss anything about her life here but there is a part of our conversation which hit me.

Her last guy had kept her expectations real low. In her two years of relationship, he had never even uttered the words 'I like you' but would only say that either you know it or you don't. I don't have to express it. She was there for him no matter what. And he didn't even remember her birthday. That's okay, right? Guys today aren't that available. Well.. it's a bullshit.

This guy, this new guy happened to tell her just a few days back that he likes her. Yeah.. 'Likes'. Please note am talking about two individuals in their late twenties.

She blushed. And said this feels cute. And his response,' I know that you know this already and I don't have to be explicit about it. But the thing is I know it will make you smile and extend a good feeling and I would be glad to be the reason behind it'.

It might sound silly but it did touch me. I totally believe in old school love. In forever and for always. In togetherness for eternity.

She did tell me that if someone loves you, he would never mistreat you. When they say they got busy with work and therefore couldn't be there, that should be your first flag. And to all the people out there, please get this in your head. No matter how busy a person is, if you do mean something to them, they will always be there, no matter what. They will know how to balance their priorities. You would be the top most. And if your are lucky enough to find someone like that, don't let go.

I urge the generation of today to take out time for the people you care about. You can keep making gold till you die, but the people who find you perfect even after knowing your flaws are the people you need to take utmost care of. They know you inside out and still hang around. Those are the ones you should always keep as close as possible. Do not take them from granted. Do not misuse their niceness. Because every individual has a threshold. You don't know how your attitude might hurt them and change them internally.

Try understanding a person. And try expressing. It won't hurt. It will only bring you closer.

Yes. Shit Happens. But there are stories like hers that show us that there is always a better day ahead.


P.S.- Waiting for my story to unfold.

Cheers!

Conversation with Still No One!

When I asked him, he said,' I think, the absence of it.'

And then he sent me,

A part of me wished these lines were for me, but whom was I kidding? So I replied back,' Wow.. Some lines, Some girl and some craziness!' He never replied back.


She looked inside her heart,
Sitting on her thoughts, sipping on her dreams.. She realised who you are.
She realised you aren't that far.

Inside of you is a mystery,
There's a soul inside your story,
You are a book without the end, a road with a soft bend.
You are the splendour of that October Sky;
You are the auroral light of the winter.. the touch to the scared and tender.

He liked it.. The above lines. 'Some lines you've got there, poet.' 'From someone to you.',I said. 'That someone is a darling.' I smiled but I did not want him to make me feel this way. 'Am sure she would be.' I replied.

'I really want to meet your girl, without you around. Am sure she would be a poem herself. And then would know how in rhythm you would be when with her..'

'Haha.. That may take a lifetime.' He laughed.

'It won't. It won't. Take my word. I so wanna know her to imagine you going weak on your knees. I so wanna see her fiddle with her hair and the way her eyes sparkle when I mention your name. I so wanna see her go coy when I tell her how lucky you are to have her and she correcting me that it's she who is.
'I wanna know your lovestory.. I want to write it. I want to know that craving. That yearning. That madness. Everything. Every emotion I say that you don't have... I wanna feel them when I meet her.'

He interrupted my thoughts,'The confidence that you show in me about having a lovestory.' I could sense the quizzical charm in his tone but I had already reached a world he had not seen inside of me.

'I really want that craziness..the feel of pride in your eyes. Oh man! I want her to prove me wrong.'

'I so wanna feel that excruciating pain of rejection, and the sense of respect that I was right about the kind of girl you would meet.'
'I wanna cry my eyes out when I write your story, and then reach out to you through my book.I want you to read it out all loud to her in a room full of candles.'
'I want your lovestory to hurt me so bad, that I fall in love with the pain of losing every bit of me. Oh! I want her to be everything that I have imagined, and everything you haven't..
I want her to be your favorite wine,
I want her to be your favorite fragrance,
I want her to be your favorite song,
I want her to be your secret serene place,
I want her to be your adventure,
I want her to be your inner peace,
I want her to be those butterflies in your stomach,
I want her to be your confidence in your nervousness..
I want her to be your everything that your never thought of.

... And then I want her to be my last novel. Which took every bit of me to write.'

'Sneh. What's wrong?'

'Nothing.' I replied.

It's all about Perspective!

You can either love the rains in India, or worry about the traffic jams while returning back home that the rains must have caused (Delhi roads!). You can either embrace the lines on your face and smile on the experiences you have had or crib that you are getting old.

There is so much pain, inside us.. for what we have been through. Some harsh words said which keep rubbing their sharp edges across your memories, some unfulfilled expectations from your loved ones which may have broken your heart. We are living in the age where girls are capable of paying their own rents and bills. They are intellectual and witty. They are smart and intelligent. Hence what does a woman of today want from her man? I read an article somewhere sometime back which had a thought provoking angle to my question. The article threw back a question to the universe asking the man- what can he bring on the table? She wants him to be a notch better. She wants him to be intellectual so that she can have mentally stimulating conversations, she wants him to understand the meaning of integrity and loyalty, she wants him to be able to guide her, she wants him to be strong enough to give her comforting hugs and give her a world she can feel proud to be a part of. Yeah.. it's too much to ask for. But then, she deserves it too. She has no qualms in being submissive, but he has to be worthy of it. Her kids should be proud to have him as the head of the family.

Whatever I wrote above can be judged and misunderstood. Again, I ask.. why do you wanna judge? Isn't their enough of other emotions that you fight every day that you wish to add another one? Yes we humans tend to face and feel a lot of feelings due to the circumstances we face. Over a period of time, if we look back we know we are not the same person that we were years back. You are a different person. Same name, same face but different. Those wrinkles tell a beautiful story. Your story. The best seller. Be proud of that. And be kind. Yes.. be kind.

I couldn't resist noticing how much unkind we have become to each other. Forget BEING kind, the usage of the word itself is a mockery. It has completely lost it's meaning. Everybody goes through shit. There is nothing that your mind, courage and time can't heal. No matter how much you try you can never be somebody else's shoes. Never. You will never be able to experience the pain they might have felt or the love they might need or what miracle a hug can do them. Learn to understand human emotions. Learn to embrace pain and then heal it. Learn to love. Learn to be kind.

Yes there are people and things you do not wish to have in your life. Then don't. Don't let your mind push you to do somethings against your heart. That's where you destroy yourself. That's where you hurt yourself. That's where you kill yourself.

Don't hurt anyone unncessarily but if accepting the fact that things may be better after taking the step helps you to breathe easily.

Try looking at a more colourful picture. Try loving yourself again. Try living.

Because in the end, it's your take.. your perspective that can make you respect yourself back.

It's all about perspective.